First, you need to know
I hate getting up in the morning. When I was a freshman in college my best
friend Jill and I would start our mornings saying, “Good morning, $#%*!”
because we had always slept through our alarms… and we were always late to
class –or- if you can imagine, looking our finest…
Well, I am now teaching
Kindergarten, which requires me to be places (like school) in a timely manner…I
have moved to a new house enabling me to get to school in 15minutes. This
means, I have to leave the house at 7:15AM not ONE minute later. On this
particular morning, I was already having a terrible week and of course, I woke
up late. In fact, I woke up at 7:15AM allowing me 5minutes to brush my hair,
change, etc., and still be 5 minutes (at best) late for work.
So let’s catch up to
speed. Literally. After zooming through my house, I ran into the car and tried
to back out of the driveway… of course, there would be 5 cars disabling me to
leave in a timely manner. After the dirt truck passed my house (no he didn’t
stop and let me in front of him and mind you, we have a stop sign right in
front of my house, so he could have stopped just a few yards sooner) and
decided to go 10 mph down the mile long road I have to go down to get to the
highway, I decided (naturally, of course) to, as he turned left, give him
the “bird” (or finger) as I turned right. Seemed like a marvelous idea. Freeing even…
However, I did feel shame as I looked in my rearview mirror and saw the person
behind me shaking his head in disapproval. I felt shame for two seconds then
decided he had probably done this before and I continued to drive like a bat
out of hell. This particular man decided to cut in front of me: not a good idea
on this morning. So again, naturally, I decided to zoom past him and get back
in front of him. This lead to a game of “chicken” and I decided to end it by
speeding up as fast as I could (and with other cars allowing me), pass him, and
slam on my breaks. I know you’re thinking… and then I wrecked. Nope. Worse. (To
me on this day).
Lights started flashing
and he revealed his true colors: that of an undercover cop. Immediately, panic
rushed through me. Not because I am particularly nervous about tickets or even
getting pulled over (believe it or not, I haven’t had a wreck that was my
fault, nor have I received a traffic ticket. Fine, yes. Ticket, no.) but because
he had seen me at my worst. Like, absolute worst.
I also didn’t think
about all the wrong I had done or plan an excuse. Instead, I decided I would be irritated with God because I seemingly always get
caught. And in that same moment, His rod upheld me through this police officer.
After the officer did the infamous “knock on the window” I began to get my
license, registration, etc., and he immediately said, “Ma’am, I don’t need any
of that. I just need you to know it’s going to be okay.” I looked at him with
tears in my eyes and began to say I was sorry and I was late for work, etc.,
and instead he cut me off and asked me to take a deep breath. 3 of them in fact.
THREE. And he watched me to make sure they were real, deep breaths. Then he told me to go to work and promise I
would “know everything would be alright.” I remembered God in this moment, how
I so often deserve punishment, but He provides Grace & Mercy over and over
again. Since this particular morning, I have learned a lot about how He
sustains me. I also haven’t flipped off any other cars nor have I gotten pulled
over…
